Guys we are so back, can you believe it? Because I sure can’t. And don’t worry, we’re starting off the semester with a real knee-slapper.
1/27:
“I can feel my butt move when I walk again, life is worth living.” I am so, so happy for you.
Of course, we can never have it all. Duo push is now requiring a code on top of it all. “Duo Mobile was bad enough and now THIS?” If Duo Mobile has no haters then I am dead.
‘umaine_paperclip’ was not happy with this new development. “Dear Umaine I would rather saw off my own arm with a blunt spork than type in those three digits… Sincerely- Umaine paper clip.” Thank you for such raw imagery.
It is no YikYak Beat without someone complaining about driving and parking on campus. “Someone please tell me how Maine still requires drivers Ed yet none of you mfs can drive to save your lives.” It hurts because it is true.
Speaking of driving, “potholes on this campus so bad they’ll knock the tampon right out ya.” This was reposted by ‘critical_stinker’, and OP shared that “if this is the only thing i’m remembered by that’s okay with me.” Oh we will remember.
Next we got ‘critical_stinker’ being the diva they are with “MY BOOT IS STUCK IN THE SNOW AND THE PLOW ISN’T SLOWING DOWN.” God, please, if you are listening: some of us could really use the free tuition.
1/31:
I love when people speak before thinking. “Is it theoretically possible to do cardio without leaving my room.” Does the answer have to be PG?
“Will someone rub my belly,” said ‘york.groundhog’. Okay Pibble, whatever you say.
Our favorite, ‘touchmytitos,’ posted “Accidentally put myself in the negatives for a triple dipper. [shaking head]” That work check can not come soon enough, huh?
Anyway, many were very excited for Delt. “I can’t wait to shake a*s in the delt basement.” Me too honey, me too.
Someone asked a really good question and I am curious if anyone has the answer. “So is it part of the trans pilgrimage to work at york dining?” Can we talk about the LGBTQ to jobs with the ugliest uniforms pipeline? Like why do we have to stunt every moment of our lives but pull a 180 for a check?
“PLEASE WHOEVER IS ON YORK DINING AUX STOP PLAYING PHOTOGRAPH BY NICKLEBACK THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME IN 24 HOURS.” I am going to take a wild guess and say that whoever was on aux was not part of the trans pilgrimage.
Speaking of poor dining experiences, “Guys do NOT eat the Oxford shower mold.” Can there be no joy in this world?
“I’m not really into politics is equivalent to saying I’m not really into hygiene”. So you’re telling me we have to shower but we can’t eat the mold? This life is a prison.
“Boys kissing…” Thank you ‘flamingnoodle’. Life hack; type this into Google if you’re looking for a good time.
Or another idea if you do not have Google, “At the hockey game. So when do they start kissing?” Unfortunately, ‘kidgoku’ said “In the locker room, fans gotta pay extra to see that.”
And finally, “UMaine cheer = racist?” Idk?
